How to Teach Your Children About Government Bureaucracy

I think I may have solved the tantrum problem.  The idea is to make them fill out forms.

The way I got the idea was this:

Sena always makes me give her shoulder rides all the time.  Shoulder rides are a big pain in the butt and I don't always feel like doing them.  So I told her she needs to fill out a "Shoulder Ride Request Form."

What's nice about this is how I get to sit down, write something quietly, and not give a shoulder ride for an additional 2 or 3 minutes while we fill out the form.  I write I [blank] hereby request [blank] number of shoulder rides.  She fills in the blanks and signs.

With this method, she not only practices her numbers and name, she learns all about how government bureaucracy works.  I told her that every time she makes a change to the form, she has to scratch out the old entry, write in the new one, and initial.  

I told her that she is only eligible for 3 shoulder rides at a time, and they can be denied for any reason.

You'd think that would infuriate a four year old, but no -- she loves it!

"How many shoulder rides do I have remaining?"  She asks after each shoulder ride.

Well, anyway, this idea made everybody so happy, when, later, they were drawing pictures on their easel and started yelling at each other, I just ignored them and then yelled into the room, "if anyone would like to register a complaint, file into the living room and speak to me privately!"

Sena very happily came in and sat down at the couch, and very calmly articulated her complaint about her little brother -- he's not giving me any chalk, and she wanted to draw a picture of her family.

I told her she needed to fill out a Complaint Form, which she happily did.

Once it was filled out in tripplicat (just kidding, that would be unduly burdensome), I took immediate action -- I asked them to share the chalk board.

Ah, government.  Is there any problem it can't solve?